WORTHINGTON — The holidays are all about coming together with family and close friends, right? But what if this was turned on its head — what if it was about eating beside complete strangers?
This is exactly the goal that Gabriel Unger had in mind as he hosted a Friendsgiving celebration Monday night for the fourth year in a row in his expansive dance studio with raftered ceilings. Some 125 community members pitched in dishes and came bearing booze for the potluck event that was focused on separating from your spouse and family to make new friends and connections.
“One thing that we really encourage is that everyone make a point to try and meet some people you haven’t met before. Say hello to people you haven’t met before and don’t be shy,” said Unger, as he invited people up to eat. “Just for this evening — you can live your life differently when you’re not here.”
Community members understood the assignment.
Levi Gershowitz of Plainfield was huddled in conversation with a Worthington couple, Kyle Dempsey and Ally Brown. From the outside they looked like friends of a decade or more, but in reality, “I just met them,” Gershowitz said.
If an apocalypse hit you’d want to be in this room
kYLE dEMPSEY
“I’ve been in the Hilltowns for almost 10 years now, and it feels like a library of people here,” he said. Dempsey and Brown, who make their money exclusively on social media sharing their Hilltown lifestyle for an audience of 1 million people, shared the same sentiment.
“If you came here from a more populated town, you’d be like, ‘what are the residents like?’ And there’s such a mix of people who have been in this town their whole life that are old,” said Dempsey. “But then there’s people younger than us and it’s way more diverse than you would think.”
Given the “characters and legends” who attended, Dempsey said that, “If an apocalypse hit you’d want to be in this room.”
Finn Carswell, who attends the Williston Northampton School, aspires to work in the fashion industry. He said it is often difficult to meet people outside one’s immediate circle, but on Monday he had luck and was able to connect with a lady involved in modeling.
Strangers Matt DeVito and Italian author Andrea Villa, who is spending three months in town to focus on writing, sat next to each other over dinner.
“I just met him. He’s a good guy though — an Italian,” said DeVito.
Meanwhile Chris Ryan, who lives on the Chesterfield-Worthington line, called the night “a wonderful evening of community.”
Checklist
The checklist to hold such a gathering includes people, food and a place to gather.
Countless people praised Unger for hosting the night — like Vicky Dwight, who called him “the mayor of Worthington.” Dwight contributed her own part to the event and helped arrange furniture and sitting areas within the dance studio.
Her daughter Isabel Dwight owed her mom some money. So instead of repaying she agreed to bartend for the night, regardless of the fact that she had no experience.
“It’s important to encourage people to do this, especially during times where there is food insecurity, loneliness and isolation,” Isabel Dwight said, and added that rum and pineapple was the drink of choice.
She also shared her very concise inventory list needed to hold on events like these, saying that, “All we had was space and enough people to bring food.”
Lauren Cantalonis came with chips, guacamole and salsa and placed them on a 30-foot table that was loaded with food by other attendees. The table featured the essentials, turkey and all the fixings, as well as pasta dishes, potatoes, salads, appetizers, dips, desserts and a seemingly endless menu of other foods.
Other volunteers laid out long tables decorated with artificial moss, votive candles and small accents. And outside, a fire pit was kept going, and people smoked their herbs of choice around it.
(No) politics at the table
Unger said for a gathering like this to be successful, people need to put neighbor ahead of ideology. He also believes that people aren’t as divided as social media would make it seem.
“I think when we talk about our fractured climate, that’s what social media wants us to think,” he said. “I actually think we’re still talking to each other more than they want us to think we are.”
Amillie Coster returned to the area, coming from Great Barrington where she works as a garden designer. She was having fun making a coded political statement for what could have been perceived as a party anthem.
On a floor to ceiling chalkboard at the entrance to the dance studio, she wrote in bold letters, “Turn the volume up,” the words Mayor-elect Zohran Mamdani said in his acceptance speech after winning the New York City mayoral election earlier this month.
“The number one thing I ask for people to leave with tonight is that you can’t bring up politics at Thanksgiving … but you can be subliminal about it,” she said. “Just turn up the volume and it’s a dance party, so it works.”
Unger got the idea to told these annual Friendsgiving celebrations from the co-owner of Liston’s Bar and Restaurant in Worthington, Brigid Ryan. He also doesn’t want people to feel like gatherings like these are unique.
“This is literally what happens in Alabama,” he said.