Child care workers recognize behaviors in young children that they know are unproductive in a well-functioning community like the ones they expect to create in a preschool or neighborhood.
A common one occurs when a child points at a friend accusing, “She hit me,” or “He called me a name.” Caregivers are insightful in recognizing and redirecting this behavior. They know that children who make such accusations are often the ones who do the behavior themselves.
Instead of reacting by criticizing the child being pointed at, they respond calmly to the accuser with something like, “Hmmm … and what happened before that?” If the child denies having ever hit or called names, the adult in charge might say, “But I was standing right here, and I saw when you …” These adults are astute in guiding children as they learn to be honest and to accept responsibility for their actions for the good of everyone, which is an important life lesson.
Unfortunately, such behavior appears daily in our news. The most recent example involves the president accusing our neighbor leader of being “dishonest and weak.” Teachers of young children know the pointing finger should be pointing back at the accuser.
I have to wonder who neglected this caregiving role in Queens 65 years ago and who is neglecting it right now. For the future of our just society, none of us can afford to accept this inappropriate behavior. We have plenty of evidence that it is the accuser who is guilty.
Margaret Riddle
Leeds