I’m an X-Large. I used to be 5-foot-9, I am now 5-foot-7 and I still wear an X-Large.

It isn’t pretty, dear reader, but there will be no problem fitting me into a coffin or oven.

I’m leaning toward the latter, but I’m still undecided.

It is not unusual to be undecided as to how to exit this world, is it? There are clear choices, each having similarities and differences, pros and cons. In all honesty, I don’t really care which way I go out. I will most likely opt for the simplest, least expensive method.

Often, when confronted with two or more choices, I find my decision depends upon my mood. Mocha chip or chocolate? The Great Gatsby or Moby Dick? Casablanca or Annie Hall? Mr. Tambourine Man, My Back Pages, or Desolation Road? Call me undecided with these and many other choices, but on any given day, my mood dictates where I stand.

On more important issues, I am quite clear about what I believe, but I’m sometimes willing to budge a bit. If it means bringing a community together, I am willing to slightly modify my opinions on abortion, gun ownership, environmental regulations, energy and immigration. This, of course, does not mean I am undecided; my beliefs are strong, but I try to adapt them if it helps bring people to a place of acceptance and understanding.

And soon, of course, will come the BIG decision: Trump or Harris? As you know, polls fluctuate from week to week, the bottom line being that the two candidates are running neck-and-neck. So, in all likelihood, the “undecideds” in a few battleground states will determine the outcome of the election and the state of our democracy in the coming years — a sobering thought.

Over 40% of voters are committed to casting ballots for someone who has zero interest in their needs or livelihoods. So be it. They have been sucked into a black (red) hole and are unsalvageable. As the French statesman and diplomat Charles Maurice De Talleyrand once said, “In politics, stupidity is not a handicap.”

But what’s downright mind-boggling is that 9-10% of American voters identify as “undecided.” Undecided! How is that even possible? We’re not talking about favorite movies, novels, or Dylan songs. This is Donald Trump vs. Kamala Harris. This is a convicted felon vs. a former prosecutor, a man (I use the term loosely) who has denigrated immigrants, women, veterans, and the disabled vs. an intelligent woman of color and Asian descent.

This is a gross, immoral individual with an undiagnosed personality disorder vs. someone who has served as vice president in an honest, compassionate, intelligent manner. Harris may not be the perfect candidate but, given the choice, would you rather sip on OK lemonade or raw sewage?

These undecideds are an interesting lot. When I read and listen to interviews, a couple of things stand out. Almost none of these people likes Donald Trump, the person; they recognize that he is a horrible human being. They also don’t seem to really care how awful he is. If what comes out of his mouth (an unidentifiable form of the English language) makes them feel safer and more economically hopeful, they are likely to vote for him.

These same folks also react positively to the new Democratic candidate. They say that Harris brings new energy to the race, that they are willing to give her a chance, to hear what she has to say and, at some point, come to a decision.

After writing the previous 584 words of this column, I became stuck. I had no conclusions or illuminating thoughts about voters who would decide the election.

I walked away for three days until, presto! I came to the following realization. (Do not expect a grand epiphany or life-changing moment, dear column-follower. Just a minor insight, a bone to gnaw on.) 

The undecideds do what all of us do, choose to open a few of their mental compartments while keeping the rest of them closed. I imagine our brains to be large storage areas filled with hundreds of little boxes that we constantly open and close as situations arise. When I order from Amazon Prime, I open my Good Price and Quick Delivery boxes, keeping shut others labeled Excess Packaging, Energy Consumption of Delivery Trucks and Bad For Small Businesses. When I golf, I do the same thing, opening my Personal Enjoyment and Good Exercise compartments while keeping tightly closed Water Usage Issues and Environmental Concerns.

We are human beings; we compartmentalize, sometimes in the form of rationalizing our behavior but, more often, I believe, for the purpose of being able to function sanely in the world. Aren’t we often engaged in thinking or acting in a manner that requires warding off guilt or uncertainty? I know that is true for me. Trump supporters have opened boxes with many labels, including tribalism, fear, belief in authority and distrust of scientific facts. Other compartments containing awful truths are locked and ignored.

And finally, we have our undecideds. They are still opening and closing their mental boxes, still trying to figure out what is truly important to them. And once they do, all boxes will be sealed except for the ones that align with their decision.

Which brings me back to making decisions based on mood. How will these 10% of voters feel when they step into voting booths? If I were an AI wiz/magician, I would invent a program designed to remotely open and shut mental compartments that contain factual evidence and common sense.

Short of that, I can only hope that many undecideds are in a “blue” mood on Nov. 3.

Gene Stamell opens and shuts his boxes in Leverett. He welcomes and responds to feedback at gstamell@gmail.com.