EASTHAMPTON — If Barry F. Wilby had a calling, few would argue that teaching, coaching and mentoring young boys and girls were it.
As a teacher at Easthampton High School, he was widely respected by students simply for respecting them. As a girls softball coach, he inspired athletes through his passion for the game.
And for kids heading down the wrong path, he could give the kind of advice that could help turn a life around, say those who knew and studied under him.
Wilby, a lifelong Easthampton resident who had battled diabetes, died Saturday at 67 surrounded by his family. Obituary, Page B2.
“He mentored a lot of kids, more than your average person in the school system,” Wilby’s younger brother, Bruce Wilby of Easthampton, said. “They called him Uncle Barry.”
Wilby taught social studies for 35 years, and also served as a dean of students and assistant principal at Easthampton High School. He was a champion of and lifelong volunteer for Easthampton sports, from the Lassie League to the high school where he coached softball — contributions that were recognized publicly in 2011 when the city named one of its ball fields, Wilby Field, after Barry and his wife, June Wilby.
Bruce Wilby said his brother became a teacher right out of college and never looked back. His impact on students was so strong that many would return to visit and stay in contact with him after he retired in 2007, he said.
“He loved it,” Bruce Wilby said. “He was a real people person. He always was a confidant of the kids. He always knew what was going on and was always trying to help them with things that were out of kilter.”
When former Easthampton High School student Matt Fournier walked out a of classroom at the high school after not seeing eye to eye with a teacher one day, he walked straight to Wilby’s office. Rather than suspend him, Fournier recalled how Wilby, then assistant principal, got Fournier settled into the library with his schoolwork as he ironed out the differences between student and teacher.
“He was trying to find ways to avoid kids being in trouble,” Fournier, now 30, of Easthampton, said. “He really tried to work with students, to create an environment where they felt comfortable.”
Fournier said Wilby time and again went out of his way to meet a student’s needs and recalled how he pushed those students who weren’t always outspoken in the classroom to participate.
“You can be guaranteed he’d find a way to engage you,” Fournier said. “He showed us so much respect. He treated us like people, not like children. I had never seen so many people pay a teacher so much respect without them demanding it.”
One of Wilby’s three daughters, Katie Chase, said her father was the inspiration for her successful pitching career as a young girl and later at the high school where he was her assistant varsity coach.
“He played a big role on the team, whether it was calling pitches for me, as a base coach, or helping girls on the field,” Chase, 31, of Southwick said.
She recalled how her father drove her two to three days a week all winter long to see a pitching coach in Southwick as she made the transition from slow- to fast-pitch softball, work that would pay off when the high school team later made a deep run in the playoffs.
“He was always putting in any and all the time I needed,” Chase said. “My success was definitely because of him. He was my biggest supporter and he was the biggest reason I wanted to succeed.”
And while she was his daugther, Chase certainly was not alone in the long list of athletes Wilby influenced along the way.
Easthampton Fire Chief David Mottor recalled how Wilby encouraged his daughter, Caelin, another successful pitcher he coached, to work on her pitching in the off-season, which paid dividends on the field. He was also instrumental in getting an under-18 women’s team back in the Metro League in recent years, mentoring coaches and players on the field, Mottor said.
“He was always offering advice to us as coaches, and the girls on how to improve their game,” Mottor, who was a coach of the under-18 Easthampton team, said. “His mentoring and coaching us coaches was the reason that team was successful.”
Mottor said Wilby was still a presence at the ballparks in Easthampton up until last season as a spectator, though hardly unnoticed in the stands.
“Adults that had played for him always made a point to come over and say hi to him,” Mottor said. “I don’t think I ever met a kid that didn’t like or respect Barry.”
Wilby was a former softball player who once played for Szary Realty, a team that had a record 75 wins in the Easthampton’s Men’s League. He served with his wife on the Easthampton Little League Board of Directors and also became an accomplished softball umpire at the college, high school and local youth levels.
“He knew his softball, and he was good at it,” Bruce Wilby said of his brother. “He knew how to teach kids and knew how to coach the girls. He spent a lot of time doing that. That was a big part of his life.”
After he retired, Wilby could often be seen chatting with friends at the local coffee shops, often in front of Shelburne Falls Coffee Roasters on Union Street. He later found work at the Mitchell Funeral Home in Easthampton where he greeted people and worked as an assistant.
Among the many friends with whom he would meet for coffee was former city councilor Morgan Mitchell, who described Wilby as “one of those guys who come around once in a generation.”
“He loved the kids, just loved his job at school,” Mitchell said. “Barry’s job fit him perfectly. He was good to everybody.”
Dan Crowley can be reached at dcrowley@gazettenet.com.