I grew up singing “My country ‘tis of thee, Sweet land of liberty.” I learned about George Washington who could not tell a lie, Abraham Lincoln who freed the slaves, Franklin Delano Roosevelt who saw us through a terrible time called World War II.
I read John F. Kennedy’s “Profiles in Courage” and developed a sense that presidents were all high-minded, honest, brilliant and true to the highest calling of selfless service. As a college student I often thought when I felt overwhelmed by time constraints and research papers: I have the same number of hours in the day as the president. Think of all he does in a day. Surely I can do this.
I grew up to see justice done when Richard Nixon resigned the presidency. Although deeply disappointed and somewhat disillusioned, I felt relieved that our government would let no one sully the high office of the president. I knew that the resignation was right and called for.
Growing older and having children distracted me, but still I kept an eye on politics. When 9/11 occurred and the tense conversation around Iraq ensued, I became outraged and deeply concerned as I saw grown men behaving like hysterical old gossips who had nothing to do but stir up trouble. I saw needless squandering of good will and high ideals.
Years went by and my heart became hopeful again with the election of a high-minded man named Barack Obama. I felt that maybe working together toward the common good of all Americans was once again on the horizon. My dismay returned when the recalcitrance of those in the opposite party became “the opposition,” seemingly in all things.
I saw the rise of a man I had scarcely known before, except for his name on New York City buildings where I lived. What was his signature message that was covered again and again on nightly news programs? “Birther-ism”: the hare-brained accusation that maybe our president wasn’t American after all.
This fabrication grew and grew until one surreal evening the man announced he was running for president. I had to laugh. This man was not high-minded. He was a charlatan. He inaugurated his political career (a shift from one reality show to another) by defaming our current president. He wasn’t honest. He had never shown a high calling for selfless service. Well, I had to admit the circus that followed was entertaining. He could never win, though, right?
Wrong. Despite his coarse language, refusal to submit tax returns, daily slings and insults that would have gotten anyone else in our society fired in a New York minute, the man kept going. He kept going and bullying and insulting, calling his political opponents names, bragging about sexually assaulting women, lying again and again, bloviating with impunity about his conquests, his intelligence, his riches and his knowledge of the world.
He made fun of the disabled, he said things like, “I’d like to punch him in the face,” told his supporters if they assaulted a protester he’d pay their legal fees. Again and again I was astonished, horrified, angry and stunned. Again and again, I watched as his opponents fell, dropped out and graciously stepped aside for the big bully. But, he couldn’t win, no way.
Because we had the most qualified person ever running against him. A person so smart, so experienced, so talented and for so long in public service, that many of us knew he could not possibly beat her. We had another breakthrough in store, we were sure: the first woman president.
Many people complained she was not “likable” enough, maybe too “slick” in her public persona, perhaps “dishonest” because of some emails that were deleted, some “deals” that weren’t exactly clear in the past — she was not perfect. She was not as charismatic as the previous president, and certainly not her husband. But, man, was she qualified.
She lost. Heartbreak. Depression. A feeling of floating in space, being lost at sea, in shock, in mourning, in disbelief. It happened, OK. We all had to collect ourselves, pull up our yard signs (but not for a few weeks, we just couldn’t), put on a smile, say maybe it would be all right.
It’s not. For nine months we have suffered in horror and sorrow, shock and disgust. We have watched the president resolutely undertake the task of tearing down the legacy of our previous president. We have watched the traditional forms of measured and responsible communication morph into crude, insulting and childish tweets. We have listened as he speaks “off the cuff” in ways that, astonishingly, people say is “telling it like it is.” It’s not. It’s lies and gas and infantile defensiveness.
As a mother, I have always tried to teach my children to take responsibility for their actions. From this president we hear only about how the other guy is to blame. I’ve tried to teach my children humility, respect and a readiness to admit when they’re wrong. From the president we hear nothing of the sort. The bragging, the blaming and the bloviating continue unabated.
As a person of faith, I treasure the values of the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, faithfulness and self-control. I’ve never seen a hint of these qualities from the president, as he seems to take deep pleasure from behaving like a thug.
As a Christian I could never have voted for this man. I was astounded that so many could see him as “the anointed one” for the Christian community, as well as the country. I have not stopped rolling my eyes, pleading to God and pouring ashes on my head.
I have seen him in such a short time, turn our country from the high-minded warm and welcoming refuge where everyone wants to be, into a closed-door society, where climate science is denied, refugees are turned away, Muslims are banned, and women are demeaned and trivialized.
Worse than this, perhaps, are those who will not stand up to him. They say, “Listen to what he does, not what he says.” No one in the private sector would be given such a pass. Do words not matter? Are we not to listen to our leaders? Shame.
They say, “It’s the law. He’s the president. There’s nothing we can do.” Are we waiting for moral and ethical collapse? Are we waiting for nuclear annihilation? Outright civil war? Because I am convinced these things are on their way.
We have five living former presidents. Can they not do something? We still have high-minded, selfless and truly good people in government, people who strive for high ideals, generous governance and a healthy relationship with the rest of the world. Where are they? Why are they not doing the work of removing this nightmarish insult to everything America stands for? I am waiting, praying and protesting for this.
The Rev. Julie G. Olmsted, of Northampton, is pastor of the Trinitarian Congregational Church in Northfield.